At the beginning, everything is dull and boring and won't capture a lot of readers. Thank god for that, else I wouldn't be writing this now. Basically since not a lot of people will read the first post of any blog, I can write whatever I want - well, most of what I want/
Like the title says, I'll be confessing several things that I've kept hidden from people, big or small. This is kinda like my secret diary, and I'll leave this here as a reminder to how bad I am now, and hopefully gotten better in the future. Oh, and don't mind the grammar, I honestly don't really care at this particular moment.
Before I begin, let me just say that I'm an 18-year old straight male. I'm from Malaysia, but I've lived in Europe when I was a kid. That's it for introductions, let's get to it.
CONFESSION NUMBER ONE: I am not a good person.
Y'know, you're not the only one who's bad, there are others more who are definitely way worse than you are - says most people. Well yes, I know, but from my perspective, I quite literally hate myself. I'm obnoxious, selfish, lazy, and I can't even put in the effort to do the things I'm supposed to do. Even now, I have a ton of homework to do, but noo, right now I'm writing this blog while reading manga. Just goes to show you how bad I am at controlling my desires and emotions,
Not just that, I am an absolute terrible Muslim. I was born into Islam, so I've pretty much grown up with Islamic values welded into my very being. I even live in Malaysia, an Islamic country, and have parents that are quite religious, so you might think that in terms of religion, I'll be alright. Sadly, I myself know how terrible I am. I rarely pray, even rarer for me to read the Al-Quran, and anything extra?
*sigh*, I just - I just can't seem to control myself. I sincerely want to change, to be a better person than others, but it's just SO HARD. "Just do it!" just isn't enough motivation for me to actually become productive, and I always find excuses or ways to escape from whatever I actually have to do, It's scary just how good I am at avoiding my responsibilities, seriously.
